Tuesday 12 August 2014

So Much Change

I was thinking the other day how much things have changed. 
Then I got to thinking how much I had changed.  Life sends us on paths we least expect and unless we rigidly stick to fixed opinions and timetables we can meander down these paths and cherry pick that which we most would like to do.
Sat chatting about this to a friend she asked me what had changed the most during the course of my life and one by one these things came to mind.
Stay at home Mum to Shop Manager
I volunteered at Oxfam on a Saturday morning when my husband could mind the boys, just to get me out of the house a bit and to meet new people, within six months I was the paid Shop Manager working 30 hours a week.  This was my career path for 20 years, moving from charity to charity.
Married with kids to divorcee with one teenager at home.
It had to happen there was no way forward.
Cat lover with 4 cats to animal lover in general with 3 dogs and 1 cat.
Shop Owner to Small holder/Self Sufficiency Wannabe
Girl who ate bacon buns for breakfast and bought a pre cooked chicken breast to zap in the microwave every night for tea on the way home from work to vegetarian (occasionally venturing into Pescatarian territory).
Following on from that one ... girl who lived for two years on ready meals and sandwiches (I left my first marriage with only my clothes, books, cats and son so we didn't have a cooker) to one who cooks from scratch with veggies from the garden.
Girl with a back concreted yard to one with 5 acres.
And I realised this morning how much my food tastes had changed in the last few years, when I decided to make myself some Oatbran Porridge for breakfast.   I haven't had it for ages and yet when I did the Dukan Diet I ate it every single day for a year and loved it.  This morning it made me feel totally yucky and very ill afterwards, me and milk no longer get on AT ALL.  I have drunk my last Latte and ate my last milky porridge.
I could go on and on and on and bore you all senseless but you get the picture.  Life threw me curveballs and I just went with them,  even my food and drink tastes have changed dramatically.  I mean I'm even sat here drinking black, unsweetened coffee when I used to be a white with two sweeteners girl.
  So much has changed, most of it for the best and I just rolled with the changes.  I think you have to don't you to keep yourself sane.  I know now I am more self reliant than ever before, I have little or no regard for material possessions.  I could watch my house burn down and not shed a tear as long as those I love, both human and animal were safe with me.  Starting again would not phase me in the slightest.
I know what's important in life ... family, friends, health and happiness, a bit of financial security helps to but is not the be all and end all.  We are so lucky in this country with what we have, mostly a roof over our heads, food in our tummies and people that love us.  There are so many that have none of that, and we that do have the ability to be able to help those that do not.
Gosh so much whizzing around my head today not the usual sort of post at all ....
... oh and by the way Karon's Pickled Radish recipe worked very well.
The remains of the pickled radish are sitting very prettily in the fridge with the vinegar now a beautiful shade of pink.
What has been the biggest change in your life, or maybe it was a small change that made the biggest difference ?
Sue xx


  1. What a lovely post. It's amazing how far people come when hurdles are thrown in the way. Myself a child with nothing being past from post to post. Fought hard worked hard studied hard now I have a lovely family a house we own and this is something I thought would never happen to me as I was destined to follow in certain peoples footsteps.

  2. Such an interesting post Sue. You are so right, we are very lucky to have family, home and something to eat when so many have nothing.

    I was a bit of a 'wild child' but the moment I was handed my first born I completely changed.

  3. What a lovely post sue..hmm lots of things have changed for me..i think the most profound one was being pregnant at 37..so unexpected but amazing. We both decided from that moment our lives had to change..no junk food and getting back to how we originally were..back to growing our own and working harder to be debt free. Even though we already had 4 children in their teens..baby number 5 totally changed us. Now i am full time home schooler and grow all our veggies and just look forward to everyday with my girls..o and baby number 6 definitely changed us..all for the better..we spend our days working together and i am learning just as much as they are..i have learnt to love life all over again. So my little Fern and Iris even though they were surprise babies..changed me for the better..

  4. We are very lucky here in UK, the news each day so full of horrors people do to each other. Our lives are better for the unexpected landing on our door step. Back in 1982 I was such a snob, husband left me with young baby, I grew up and met my 2nd husband and had a better life. I loved reading your post.

  5. It's always good to reminisce about our good fortunes. The biggest change in my life came with becoming strong enough to give up on a bad marriage, survive as a single mom with three teenagers, then find the wonderful man to whom I've been married for 30 years. Whatever we face in life, we need to move forward and make the best of every situation.

  6. We were financially able to take early retirement, so we did and moved all the way across the United States from California to rural Georgia and we love it.

  7. Our biggest change was overcoming our house fire, where we lost everything. We have literary rebuilt our lives.

  8. Very good post. I read this and all the comments and thought- Gawd, I'm so boring!

    1. Your not boring at all what you and C have achieved is amazing I hope to have just a small slice of what you do one day.

  9. Life is all about change and hopefully growth. The biggest life changes for me have been the loss of family members. I think that is the thing that has the most impact on how we see the world and our own lives. We learn what is important and also to get the best out of our time on the planet.

    Jean x

  10. A lovely thought provoking post. I'm of a similar path as yourself but I've yet to get 5 acres! I will settle for the allotment x

  11. A lovely thought provoking post Sue, thank you.
    Thinking back I have had oh so many life changes and now know that nothing stays the same, we are always moving on. My biggest change was the day my husband came home and said we have been offered a work assignment in America for two years. After living 43 years of my life in the UK it was an amazing change and I admit, took a lot of courage. After all it was only for two years right? Well the two years turned into three and so on, I am still here after 20 years, now with a new American husband.
    Important to enjoy the here and now and roll with the punches.
    Pam in TX.xx

  12. The biggest change for me was the diagnosis of my heart condition when I was 43 and in my final year of teacher training. With the help of a psychologist I changed from being the driven, stressed, irritable, perfectionist of a woman that I was, into the person I am today - a housewife who is absolutely skint,but very calm and extremely happy.That diagnosis was an absolute blessing. My cardiac nurse told me categorically that if I had continued as I was I would have followed the same path as my beloved Dad, who had a fatal heart attack with no warning when he was 55. I subsequently lost 3 stones of fat, and am fitter and stronger than I was in my 30s. I'll be 50 in February, and to make it in good shape is the only gift I want.

  13. Similar life changes to you, food has been a big change for me, mum was a terrible cook and we had to eat her offerings put me off many a food, I used to dread meal times, now I enjoy the taste of real food, I even eat sprouts and casseroles when mum served them I used to gag.
    Finding my soul mate has been the biggest change apart from having kids, we have been together 30 years and its like we have never know anyone else but each other.

  14. Interesting... mum & housewife for the last twenty years and at 51 ( co ) manager of a charity shop ! ! !

  15. Loads of changes happened to my life. Firstly, moved from native Germany to Britain, eventually split from my abusive husband with my daughter, then was married for some time to a Brit, but discovered after 16 years and two more kids that he was sexually abusing my daughter, so had another relationship split. Brought up three teenagers by myself, then found my current partner who had 4 children by a previous marriage. I endured some
    bad years with his eldest daughter who was a very rebellious teenagers, took drugs and was abusive towards me until I finally threw her out of my home. My partner and I get on well now as long as I don`t have to see his kids too often. My own three kids are grown ups now and I`ve been made a grandmother by my youngest son`s daughter. Life is like a rollercoaster at times, but we ride it to the best of our abilities.

  16. Sue, I totally agree with your views on material possessions. What changed my perspective on life a few years ago was my dad's diagnosis of Parkinsons and my sudden stress induced illness. Luckily, I have now recovered and slowed down enough to appreciate the simple pleasures of life and my wonderful family. So, lovely to share our different experiences and unite in our gratitude, thank you xo

  17. I've had quite a lot of changes in my life, but I just see that as normal. Moving on is part and parcel of life. Spose my biggest change was throwing myself in at the deep end and becoming a lorry driver. As a shy 27 year old slip of a thing I found it incredibly frightening, but at the same time exciting.

  18. Very thought provoking! Especially as I have a huge '0' (stands for OMG!) birthday on Thursday!! I have been thinking lately, how on earth have I reached this age so quickly!! I have also been taking stock! My life changed dramatically when I was 10yrs old, my Mum died and when Dad remarried several years later I suddenly had a step-mother, the exact opposite of my Mum!! Life was horrendous!! I eventually was old enough to leave home and life improved, I met some lovely people, travelled the world, settled down in a rather odd marriage, but I survived and have 2 fabulous son's and now a lovely daughter in law. Most days I feel blessed but occasionally have a wobble!!! Funny thing is although I cannot forget those awful years, I am now Carer for my Step-mother, so be careful how you treat people, you never know when you may need their help!!!

  19. Five years ago I was the director of a company I helped to set up. I was very proud of what we had done, very stressed out and pretty well paid. I was also living in a tiny flat with my husband that we couldn't sell. Now we're in our forever home, have two lovely children and I am going back to my less well paid but also much less stressful newish job at 16 hours a week. My work/life balance is more...balanced!

  20. Brilliant post, deffo food for thought.
    One of my biggest changes was to throw some clothes into a backpack when I was 23 and travel to the other side of the world, where I met my lovely Hubby and still live (over 20 years later). I am feeling the pull to return 'home' now, mainly for the laid back lifestyle and wide open spaces. Hopefully the dream will become a reality in the next few years.

  21. I have been through the wringer with divorces (sadly, plural) and quite unexpectedly found myself to be the proud mom of a transgender child. Untypically, I have always been grateful for my education and career - it is my rock!

  22. What a good post. Your right how life changes over the years. My biggest challenges were becoming a mom at 16, leaving home only to return at 21 to rebuild my life and confidence after an abusive relationship.

    X x

  23. My life has changed SO much over the last ten years that I don't even know where to start. But being free from any debt is the biggest change.

  24. Sometimes in my darkest times, it felt like I was the only one having a tough time. Not true of course, and I knew it even then, but it still catches me out sometimes to hear of the difficult times of others. Even now, I still assume that most people sail through life in a straightforward way.
    Thought provoking post


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